A few years ago, over a quiet breakfast, I asked a good friend, Edgar Stoesz—someone thirty years my senior—what advice he had for a guy approaching sixty. He paused, smiled, and then shared something that’s stuck with me ever since.
“When you’re young,” he said, “your career is like a seed. You plant it, water it, nurture it. Over the decades, it grows into a strong, beautiful tree—one that bears fruit and provides a lot of benefit to others. But the day you retire? It’s like taking an axe to your tree. Suddenly, it’s gone. The career. The work. Often, your community. And for many—especially men—their sense of purpose.”
It’s the reason so many people say, “I’ll never retire!”
He went on to explain that for over sixty years, life has structure. You wake up with a plan. There are meetings to attend, deadlines to meet, people counting on you. Then, on the first day of retirement, all of that vanishes. You wake up with nothing on the calendar—unless you put it there yourself.
He told me there are three things that matter most in this next chapter:
1. The support of family and friends. Retirement can be emotionally disorienting. You’re adjusting to a new rhythm, and having a strong social network makes all the difference. These are the people who remind you that you’re more than your job title.
2. Enough money—but not too much. You don’t need to be rich. In fact, having too much can lead to anxiety about preserving it. But having too little can make life stressful. The goal is to live comfortably and within your means, so money doesn’t dominate your thoughts.
3. Worthy things to do. This one really stuck with me. It’s not just about staying busy. Sure, golf, travel, and hobbies are great. But you also need something that gives you purpose—something that connects you to your community and gives you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
Then he said something beautiful: “When a tree is cut down, new shoots often sprout from the stump. That’s because the root system is still alive and strong. Your career and life experience have built a deep root system. You have so much to offer—to your family, your community, and the world. It’s up to you to cultivate your worthy shoots.”
That image has stayed with me. Retirement isn’t the end of the tree—it’s the beginning of something new. You get to decide what grows next. You get to choose how to invest your time, your energy, and your heart.
So here’s to the next chapter. As career ends, consider those new shoots and see what kind of forest you can help grow.