Siblings reflect on their upbringing, their shared wisdom, memories and the ways they interact today
Written by Juanita Fox, director of media experiences and storytelling
Siblings Sue Fitzgerald, a Garden Spot Village resident since January 2024, and Tom Payne, a Garden Spot Village resident since June 2026, completed the Wisdom Course together in 2025. Tom was so impacted by the course that he volunteered to join the teaching team. Through 2026, he is participating in the class again—this time as a facilitator. Here is a bit of the wisdom they learned as they journeyed together.
“I didn’t grow up in the same household as you did,” Sue reflects to Tom. Although they are only two years apart, as the youngest girl, raised in the 1950s and 1960s, Sue’s parents had higher expectations for their daughter. This difference in expectation,
discipline and barriers affects their stories, even today.
While their lives meandered on different paths, they both found their way to Garden Spot Village. Sue found the community first, but as she shared her decision with Tom, he was intrigued and began to do his own research. Soon, he and his wife were moving in too.
After reflecting, Sue says to Tom, “How blessed are we that we get to spend time together at this point in our lives? You are a gift to me.” “And you are to me as well,” Tom replies.
Tom and Sue’s father believed in higher education. Sue was encouraged to go to college and pursued a career as a reading specialist. “I was always grateful that I had a career I loved,” she says. “I always asked, ‘What can I do to make this child successful?’” Tom joined the Navy at 17, enlisting before he was drafted to Vietnam. “Joining the Navy was one of the best things that ever happened to me,” he says. He saw three months of active duty in Vietnam before returning stateside to Norfolk and completing his four years of service. The Payne family was full of sailors, so it was an obvious choice. Tom jokes, “I wanted clean sheets at night. In the Army, you don’t get that guarantee.” After finishing his service, he used the GI Bill to get a degree in business.
An avid learner, Sue is also an avid traveler. “Our world has so much to offer. Until you experience a place firsthand, you really
don’t understand. The power of being there in person cannot be replaced.” Since retiring in 2014, she’s been to Africa twice as well as Poland, Hungary, Alaska and Hawaii.She looks forward to even more experiences in the future.
Tom and Sue explored Kenya together with Garden Spot’s Travel with Purpose trip in October 2025. This shared experience is one of many they have had that has helped them rediscover what it means to be siblings.
History shapes our experiences today. Reflecting on their own experiences and upbringings helped Tom and Sue both understand themselves better. “I understand now, why I react the way I do to certain people,” Tom shares. “I’m working on those reactions,” he says. Sue agrees, “If you are kind to me, I will do anything for you.”
“Everyone faces adversity,” Sue says. “How we respond determines who we become.” At age 44, Sue lost her father, brother and husband within six months. This adversity shaped her into a woman of even stronger faith. She says, “I told my children, ‘God has a plan; we can’t let our circumstances affect us negatively.’”
Tom acknowledged this truth, saying the Wisdom Course allows each person to explore their story in a safe, caring environment. He says, “The thing I learned about wisdom is that it is important to accept people as they are. One of my best friends in high school transitioned to a woman in 1971. Can you imagine how hard that was at that time? I was the only one who visited her when she was in the hospital.”
He continues, “That’s why I love Garden Spot Village. People accept you for who you are. And they are so kind. It feels like home.”
Hear more about the Wisdom Course on the Purpose in Retirement podcast: gardenspotcommunities.org/podcast.
This article is published in the Fall/Winter 2026 Issue of Destination Magazine. An online publication can be found here.
Juanita Fox, director of media experiences and storytelling for Garden Spot Communities, brings a wealth of marketing and storytelling experience. She is the managing editor for Destination Magazine as well as the co-host for Garden Spot’s Purpose in Retirement Podcast.